No two people are exactly alike. Yet we are all created in God’s image. The small things that bring you joy and the unique things that you find fascinating are the most beautiful things about you.
Unfortunately, we all have a tendency to compare ourselves to others. We think that by using people we admire in some way as a standard, we will improve who we are and make ourselves better people. We believe that by doing that we will be happier, instead what this does is re-affirm our feelings that we are not good enough. When we compare ourselves to something else, we are pursuing an unattainable ideal.
In that process of comparison, we destroy the very essence of who we are because we define ourselves by who we are not. We then sabotage ourselves into not being satisfied with ourselves by idealizing other’s traits as superior to our own.
We often tend to think if I could have that car, that house, that dress, that job then I would be happy but then this is futile. The only thing that results is that when we get that car, that house, that dress and that job, we just want something else. These external changes bring only momentary happiness at best.
If only I had a better nose, bigger hips, were thinner, more muscular, a size 0, then I will be happy, be loved and love myself. When is bigger or thinner ever big or thin enough?
Each of us is unique in their own way. When God created us, He made us beautiful and wonderful. Trying to compare ourselves to others squashes our uniqueness.
Comparison is a moving target. It will never give us what we need. At some point, each person we compare ourselves to is revealed as flawed, not as perfect as we thought. Then we turn to another ideal but it too will remain elusive. Years pass as we keep pursuing ideals that keep changing as we are disappointed time and time again. We become disappointed in ourselves and more unhappy.
Every time you try to be like someone else, a piece of the best part of you dies. It is time to embrace your uniqueness, face the world with boldness and bring out the best in you.
Major on your strength and use your weakness as a strength. God will see you through. As Martha Graham puts it, “There is a vitality, a life force, an energy, a quickening that is translated through you into action, and because there is only one of you in all of time, this expression is unique. And if you block it, it will never exist through any other medium and it will be lost. The world will not have it. It is not your business to determine how good it is nor how valuable nor how it compares with other expressions. It is your business to keep it yours clearly and directly, to keep the channel open.”